It Girl

PART I

Her body moves through the water as though she’s part of the wave. A full, free-flowing form that glides across the milky blue pane. Her strong thighs command the faded pink surfboard beneath her feet. Her ankles, adorned with glistening gold chains, hold her firmly on the aging fiberglass.

The sun burns high in the overcast sky. Warm rays fall perfectly upon the water, like a spotlight illuminating a stage.

I wait as she – let’s call her Claudia – catches three or four waves, just like she said she would.

Her full voluptuous body rises out of the milky whitewash, like a phoenix. Her long caramel hair now the color of my short black curls, saturated by the ocean.

I’ve been fantasizing about how fresh her pussy will taste after she’d been in the water; how slippery her body will feel in my hands.

~~~

Claudia was the ‘it’ girl at our all-girls Catholic school—both loved and envied for being beautiful, smart, sporty and kind. One part of me wished I could be her, while another part of me wished I could be with her.

I knew she was bi-curious because at school she’d spoken openly about wanting to experiment with girls, but I didn’t think I was her type, so I was surprised when we matched on HER a few weeks before our final exams. 

We developed a casual sex relationship, which we kept secret because our school had a religious policy that if two students were known to be homosexual, they’d be asked to go for counselling with the school psychologist. Not only did this sound awful, but sadly our reputations would have been scorned, and we were scared it might impact our eligibility for awards once we graduated. 

Luckily our houses weren’t far apart, so during the exam break, I started “studying” at her place when her parents were at work.

Claudia’s bedroom had sandy wooden floors, and soft white billowing curtains. It smelled like sandalwood and coconut-lime—the mixed scent of the incense and candles she liked to burn. Her bed was a haven where I could melt into the sheets and let pleasure envelop me. Her body was the site of my bi-sexual exploration—the first girl I ever kissed and the first pussy I ever tasted. 

The first time she ate me out, my whole body was submerged in her sea of snow-white linen, as she softly licked the length of my spiky, swollen, eager pussy with long gentle strokes. She was inquisitive with my pussy, as though it were a flower of unfurling petals. She opened me up delicately, searching for my clit with her fingers and eyes, telling me my pussy was cute. Then gently, she’d roll her tongue around my clit, making me groan softly with each little orbit.

When I’d cum, it was like landing on a cloud. I’d dig my fingertips tightly into the plush white duvet cover beneath me and fling my head back into the soft white memory foam, letting my entire body rumble under waves of pleasure.

But, after graduation, those waves of pleasure dwindled into ripples, as she started playing me hot and cold. 

Like the push and pull of the ocean tides, she drifted between phases of wanting me or wanting nothing to do with me. Sometimes we’d message each other every day, for days, and other times she’d leave me waiting weeks for a reply. Her affection was flaky, but unwavering – I barely got to taste her, unless we were at a party or a club where we could sneak away from our friends.

During the weeks I didn’t hear from her, she was usually seeing some guy. When she was over him, she’d almost religiously ring me to complain about how “selfish and unbeknownst to female pleasure” she thought men were. I’d listen intently, and wonder why she even bothered with men, if they were so displeasing—a part of me wishing boys fell for me the way they did for her, and another part of me wishing she would consider seriously dating me.

But over that summer I became familiar with her free spiritedness – realizing our relationship was stuck in her “sexual experimentation” phase, and any talk of commitment could push her away entirely. When she wanted me, I was there, and I revelled in her attention.

The feeling of being held at arm's-length made me heart-sore, but my infatuation, and fear of losing her, kept me there. It was like being caught in a rip – Claudia was a wave which, over and over again, swallowed me whole, threw me into a spin and spat me out. Every time she left me breathless on the shore, I swam back out for more.

Despite those sparse, intimate moments we shared together, when I saw her Instagram stories, or bumped into her in town, I felt like a wallflower. She was the centre of attention, bathed in sunbeams by day, and strobe lights by night – a vision of beauty, opportunity and popularity I could never attain.

I struggled to grapple with the feeling of being subordinate to her because of her “It Girl” status, but also getting a confidence boost from knowing someone as magnificent as her was attracted to me.

I used work as a distraction, and by the end of summer, I’d saved enough money to rent my own tiny, studio apartment, and went to uni part time. Cluttered with books, plants, and crystal pleasure wands, I began to explore solo-pleasure and start breaking the shackles of shame around my sex life, stemming from religious-guilt. 

Having this private space meant I could see Claudia more often than just at parties. 

She’d come round, and I’d make her beg for me, teasing her with kisses all over her body, everywhere except her mouth, until she cried out for my lips to meet hers. Then I’d do the same thing to her pussy, till she was drenched and swollen. She’d try to touch herself to relieve the pressure, and I’d smack her hand away, teasing out the suspense by fingering her with just one slow-moving digit.

Together we explored new types of foreplay, like temperature play with massage candles and ice cubes, but our favorite foreplay was our “Game”—a sexy take on Simon says.

Kneeling down in front of each other, one of us would touch themselves in any way they please, and the other would copy. The person following couldn’t orgasm until the leader orgasmed, and that’s what made the game such a tease.  

Usually I took longer to finish than Claudia, and I loved making her go to the edge of orgasm and holding her there until I came.

It was like she was trying to hold together a dam wall, about to burst. Her body would buckle and jolt, as her stretched open mouth gasped for air. Only seconds after I’d cum, I’d watch her body shudder and her arms freeze up with her hands locked into her pussy, as she came too.

My sexual confidence was growing, and while I tolerated our relationship being casual, I decided to test the waters and see if Claudia would be exclusive with me. Alas, before I could muster up the courage to have that conversation, Claudia announced she was leaving for Byron Bay. 

I was depleted without her booty calls. We spoke on the phone sporadically, where she’d ramble in riddles about “finding her tribe” and “escaping the mundane,” spending her weekends surfing, drinking organic wine, and exploring tantric sex with fellow yogis.  

Hearing her talk made me feel trapped in this small cliquey city, where my self-expression was stunted by the ‘who you know not what you know’ culture permeating people’s success. I was bored at uni, bored of going to the same bars, the same beaches and seeing the same people. Once again, I was envious of Claudia, but I loved that she liked me. 

Time went by, I dabbled in a few short-term relationships, and then, without warning, she returned. She was in town on her way down south and asked to stay a few nights.

I said yes without flinching—I was addicted to her body, so erotic and sensitive to touch – so I didn’t think about the torment it would cause to be left by her again.
~~~

PART II

Claudia walks up the beach, bathed in light, sparkling where the sun hits the water droplets resting on her tanned skin.

She throws her board to the ground, and starts to untie her little black bikini top from behind her neck.

I bite my lip in anticipation, waiting for her at the edge of the shade cast by the cliff behind me.

Claudia’s full, firm tits are on show as the strings fall down to her thick, strong torso. She gestures for me to sit down, and on her command, I fall to my knees.

She stops in the last bit of sunlight, before the shadow ends, about a meter away from me. I feel like I’m in the audience of a cinema, watching a porno, as she reaches her hands around her back, to untie the remaining strings. She kneels to the ground in front of me, with her legs far apart.

Her nipples are dark brown and hard, framed by a triangular tan line.

With her eyes locked on mine, she grabs her tits and starts to trace circles around her nipples with her fingers. I follow suit, taking off my T-shirt, slipping off my bikini top, and grabbing my tits to mimic her movements.

I feel my pussy start to pulsate, as though my heart is beating in my clit, and the wetness starts to set in. My pussy becomes engorged, as I watch Claudia pull off her bikini bottoms from her firm thighs.

With her fingers on one hand, she spreads her vulva apart, and with her other hand she begins rubbing circles around her clit.

We’re playing our game – I love following her lead.

The tension builds in the space between us, as I wait for her to make the next move. I want to touch her so fucking badly, but I want it on her terms. I want her to invite me into her body.

“Fuuuuuuck you look so hot right now,” I moan, painfully deep. 

“You like that?” she says with a smirk, as she leans onto all fours.

“Eat me,” she says, breathlessly.

I drop down onto my back, careful not to get my hands in the sand, and gesture for her to come over.

She crawls my way, and with her legs on either side of my head, kneels down deep, dipping her wet pussy in my mouth.

“Oh god you’re dripping,” I moan.

Claudia breathes deep and lets out a loud sigh, as I grab her hips and rock her body back and forth over my mouth.

Her pussy is fucking delicious—meaty, wet, and salty. The warm sun on my bare skin makes me feel as though I’m melting into the sand.

As we find a rhythm, I put two fingers deep inside Claudia’s pussy while sucking and rolling my tongue around her clit. She moans with the beat of my fingers pushing in and out of her warm, engorged cunt.

“Ah… Ah… Ah…” she moans.

The faster I go, the faster she moans, and the more saturated her pussy gets. Her juice is dripping all over my face.  

“Oh my god make me squirt baby, make me squirt!” she yells desperately.

I know her body so well, I know exactly how to make her squirt. 

She rolls onto her back and I arch my body over her to get a good angle.

I grab for the water bottle beside us and quickly rinse my hands of any residual sand, then begin pushing and pulling my fingers in and out of her as fast as I can, rubbing against the ribbed, inside wall of her drenched cunt.

The sand scratches my knees as I thrust myself forwards and backwards, her mouth is wide open and moaning louder and louder, with every movement in and out.

“Keep going baby please!”

My bicep is cramping but I want to make her squirt—her whining motivates me to intensely keep rubbing.

I feel the inside of her body tense up and know she’s close. 

Claudia lets out a huge gasp, and within a few seconds her sacred fluid comes rushing out, all over my hand.

“Oh, fuck,” I moan, still rubbing her inside, as water-like liquid flows out in little bursts.

“Oh, fuck that’s so hot.”

Breathing heavily, she lays back in the sand.

I stroke the soft, lower part of her stomach with the wet tips of my fingers, as her chest rises and falls.

She giggles, pulls my face down to her neck and whispers, “you’re the only person who can make me do that.”

I turn my head inward so I can nibble on her ear.

“I know your body inside and out,” I say under my breath.  

I trace my lips over her neck, to her tight jawline, her cheeks, and across to her wet mouth—realizing we’ve hardly kissed this whole time.

She bites down on my bottom lip and begins sucking as if it’s a mango pit. Her hands reach down to my bikini bottoms, and I help her pull them down.

“Sixty-nine till we both cum?” she asks in a low, husky tone.

I bite my lip and nod excitedly. 

She yanks my ass down, so my aching, pulsating, pussy is in her mouth. She kisses and sucks at it like she did to my mouth just moments before.

In the space between sucking my clit, I feel Claudia pop open the water bottle cap with her mouth. I shudder and sigh as she squirts spurts of water on my back, flowing down my spine and into my ass. Then she rinses her hands and starts using her fingers to tease the lips of my pussy open.

She bites at my pussy’s outer lips and slowly licks the slit, making me flinch each time her tongue brushes against my clit. With every slow lick, up and down, her tongue goes deeper and deeper into the crevice of my pussy. 

She’s so flexible, her thighs are spread flat on the sand. I fumble to grab the water bottle from behind me, before leaning my elbows on her thighs.

I rinse my hands again, and pull her pussy open so I can lick her protruding clit with a flat tongue. Her moaning is so loud I can feel it vibrating through my whole cunt.

The pleasure rises from my pussy all the way up my entire body, as she holds me on the edge.

Using the tip of my tongue, I flick at her clit with absolute precision, then use the water bottle to squirt water onto her clit.

She screams as the water splashes against her clit in short bursts, dripping down her pussy and making a pool in the sand. The faster she licks me the faster I lick her, and each time she moans I feel another surge of pleasure wash over me.

The sound of the ocean smashing behind us makes her orgasm sound like the crescendo of an entire orchestra.

Her thighs lock around my head as she comes hard, in my mouth, while still eating me out. Her muffled scream is unbearably hot, and I make sure I keep flicking her clit until I know she’s done.

Satisfied, she pushes my head away, but keeps going on me. I’m right on the edge, rocking back and forth over her wet mouth.  

“You want a finger baby?” she asks, cheekily.

“Yes, yes,” I say with sighs.

She puts one finger in my ass and a surge of heat takes over my body, while she licks and fingers me at the same time.

“Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck, baby don’t stop. I’m gonna come –  I’m gonna –”

I come almost instantly, a deep, convulsing orgasm that lasts for what feels like a whole minute.

I collapse into her warm thighs, then flop my heaving body onto the sand beside her, as I feel the pulsating energy drain away from my pussy.

~~~

After three years of embracing self-love and independence, it shouldn’t hurt to be left by her again, I think. But as the orgasmic fog clears from my brain, I begin wishing she would stay forever. Jealousy takes its place in my fantasizing mind, sending me into a spiral of insecurity.

Why can’t you be like her, and enjoy these fleeting moments as they come?  

The ocean breeze brushes our bodies, as the sound of the waves quiet my mind. I lay my head on her crossed legs, as she plays with my hair, letting myself imagine the happiness we could have together.

“Don’t leave.”

Photo by Agafonova